December 11, 2015 at 6:50 pm #45985
An old geezer became very bored in retirement and decided to open a medical clinic.
He put a sign up outside that said: “Dr. Geezer’s Clinic. Get your treatment for $500. If not cured, get back $1,000!”
Doctor “Young,” who was positive that this old geezer didn’t know beans about medicine, thought this would be a great opportunity to get $1,000, so he went to Dr. Geezer’s clinic.
Dr. Young: “Dr. Geezer, I have lost all taste in my mouth. Can you please help me?”
Dr. Geezer: “Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in Dr. Young’s mouth.”
Dr. Young: Aaagh !! — “This is Gasoline!”
Dr. Geezer: “Congratulations! You’ve got your taste back. That will be $500.”
Dr. Young gets annoyed and goes back after a couple of days figuring to recover his money.
Dr. Young: “I have lost my memory. I cannot remember anything.”
Dr. Geezer: “Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in the patient’s mouth.”
Dr. Young: “Oh, no you don’t! That is Gasoline!”
Dr. Geezer: “Congratulations! You’ve got your memory back. That will be $500.”
Dr. Young (after having lost $1000) leaves angrily and comes back after several more days.
Dr. Young: “My eyesight has become weak. I can hardly see anything!!!!
Dr. Geezer: “Well, I don’t have any medicine for that so here’s your $1000 back.” (giving him a $10 bill)
Dr. Young: “But this is only $10!
Dr. Geezer: “Congratulations! You got your vision back! That will be $500.”
Moral of story — Just because you’re “Young” doesn’t mean that you can outsmart an “old Geezer”*
Remember: Don’t make old people mad. We don’t like being old in the first place, so it doesn’t take much to piss us off.December 11, 2015 at 9:20 pm #45993
Good one!December 12, 2015 at 12:11 am #45997
It’s not just because I am old, your music really does suck! Seen that on a button.December 12, 2015 at 12:18 am #46001
I love it! In less than five years, if my good luck holds, I’ll be an old man, though perhaps not a geezer.
Cry, "Treason!"December 12, 2015 at 4:55 am #46013
Thanks, Namelus. Love it! I’m not quite officially old if I have to meet L Tecolote’s criteria for that status, but I’m already practicing by getting more and more crotchety.
With everything going on around us, I appreciate the above post, and the one below that someone else posted on the SHTF Forum elsewhere recently. We need to keep a sense of humor, regardless.December 14, 2015 at 2:52 am #46056
As the saying goes–Old age and treachery….;) Especially if you make it a point to stay fit, active and alert.
Not fun getting old (almost 73) but still having fun. Went duck/goose hunting the past few days, retrieved the shot waterfowl yesterday in the kayak, and will go bowhunting in a few more. Have already set up the stand yesterday. Field dressed, cut up and froze two deer already. Caring for my disabled husband after his heart surgery–and he is now well enough to duck hunt again. Helped our (disabled vet) hunting buddy today by getting in all the decoys myself via waders and hook… Both he and my husband are younger than I.
And I can still garden, shoot a handgun well, do basic carpentry, keep house and yard, cook…and have a small art business where I do custom hunting dog portraits for people across the country. It burns me that they upped my truck insurance just because I hit 70. I am NOT a statistic, nor am I a frail old blue-hair.
It’s not over yet!!!December 14, 2015 at 4:36 am #46059
Wildartist, glad to hear your husband is on the mend nicely. And your impressive attitude (and consequent abilities) are good motivation for the rest of us. Thanks for sharing.December 14, 2015 at 12:37 pm #46063
Good going wildartist! No its not over yet.December 19, 2015 at 9:21 pm #46155
Anyone want another laugh at a certain group’s expense? Pay attention to the rapist walking across the street toward the camera.
Middle Eastern Rape Victim Gets Revenge in Broad Daylight
Either one gets it, or one doesn’t. No comment.July 27, 2016 at 2:14 pm #49613
Found on Facebook, with the following accompanying statement:
These are the most deadly bullet clips of all time. We must do something to stop this madness. These rounds are capable of dispensing at 600 magazine clips per second, and they can travel up to 12 miles.
One comment to the post seems to pretty much wrap it up:
Those are high velocity, armor piercing, GPS guided, drone fired, incendiary rounds.
Enjoy.September 19, 2016 at 10:45 pm #50009
From the Mensa Society home page:
“Membership of Mensa is open to persons who have attained a score within the upper two percent of the general population on an approved intelligence test … .”
From the 22nd Amendment of the Constitution of the United States:
“Section 1. No person shall be elected to the office of the President more than twice … .”
Attached photo from the streets of a Georgia city on 19 September 2016. No, it is not photo-shopped, and it is not from an unknown source. We were stopped at a light today and my wife was driving. I was adding a couple of things to my “To Do” list for the day when she burst out laughing and told me to look at what was directly in front of us. With cell phone in hand, I quickly switched from the “To Do” list to the camera. Still laughing out loud…. (The photo does enlarge.)September 20, 2016 at 12:57 am #50015
If that is an example of the ‘upper 2 percent’ we are in very serious trouble. But of course, all of us on this forum already knew that…September 20, 2016 at 1:08 am #50016
I always wondered what kind of people it took to approve the “approved intelligence test.” I think I just found out.
Cry, "Treason!"September 20, 2016 at 4:23 am #50020
Oh, they accept IQ scores from any of the standard, recognized IQ tests (Wechsler, Stanford-Binet, etc.), as well as a few other “equivalents” such as a high SAT or GRE score that would generally indicate a high IQ. Yes, they also have their own test for those that haven’t been able to obtain an IQ score from school testing, or don’t have a decent SAT or GRE score, for example, but the bottom line is that the concept of having a top 2% IQ score, regardless of the testing used to obtain the score, is NOT indicative of anything other than that person’s brain is capable of doing a multitude of specific, measurable functions better than 98% of everybody else. It says NOTHING about the common sense or social appropriateness of the individuals holding membership in the “society.” DC is full of them ….
[Note: I had to do enough IQ testing in grad school to be able to become certified in the tests. One learns a lot in that process …. Talk about having one’s eyes opened! I was just a young (late 20s) grad student at the time, without a lot of “life experience” yet. What an education – and preparation for the rest of my life in the real world! LOL!]September 20, 2016 at 1:49 pm #50027
True…those academic tests “test” for specific abilities, not the common sense and inventiveness that helps us cope with the real world…or survival. Most of the ‘high IQ’ people would die within 24 hours of a true disaster.
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