God bless you as well freedom. If you pray and listen with an open mind you will have the answer best for you. ‘Ask and ye shall receive’ is something I think you understand. Listen to no one but the small, little voice inside you that whispers it’s advice. I know nothing. I only express me own feelings.You will be guided by the grace of the God you obviously believe in. Take heart in that. I do not go to church. But, I believe there is a force that ‘runs the world’, there is a greater plan. There is a reason for our lives. We must find that only by looking inside ourselves. I truly hope twhat I say helps in some small way.