I own a Sig Sauer Mosquito .22 LR http://www.sigsauer.com/CatalogProductDetails/mosquito.aspx
which I think I my start her with, The .380 is a model that is very small and hard to handle. I had my 15 year old son shot the .380 and he had a problem hitting the target. He would have to hold it strong to keep the front from going up some. So the .380 is a no no for right now.
The .357 revolver can go down to a .38 Special. My 9mm Baretta 92 FS is on the heavy side but I can us it later on. I am planning to purchase a Glock 19 soon which is not that heavy.
My ideal thing would be for her to like the Glock 19, I then would get another Glock 19.