Intense Realism, I am so sorry for your suffering. Early trauma is very difficult.
I wish I could say something that would reduce your pain… but there is nothing I could say that would make it better. It’s possible the pain will never get better…
Saying that, all of us have within ourselves this incredible ability to heal ourselves… We have to choose the journey toward wholeness and healing. It’s no fun, and the path is full of pain… but we all have the choice, even when we do not choose it, we have that choice too.
Don’t underestimate the power of just getting on with living life. The children do still play… and the birds do still sing… and the music still stirs the heart… long after all of us are dead, and gone, and forgotten. Put the past where it belongs… in the past where it cannot hurt anyone, anymore. Do not speak of it, for speaking of it, just bring it all back again… over and over.
Find something to live for today… and live for today. Tomorrow will take care of tomorrow.