Thank you Selco and others for sharing your stories about seeing (and surviving) death of others.
I have not been a live witness of violent death.
My ptsd thoughtpatterns try to prepare me for the possibility of this in the future, in case something bad happens.
As a security guard I did witness my first and only situation of someone dying, I and my colleagues did perform first aid, cpr, ambulance personnel later gave electric shocks but did not help, the guy already had cancer and he died after he fell on a hot sunny day.
As a new security guard I had the special honors of writing the report. The road to death for this man was pretty gruesome, lots of heavy breathing, compulsions, really weird colourings of the kin etc. It looked like a bleeding (from falling) slimey zombie. My colleague did mouth to mouth breading, he was ex military and more experienced than I was.
My managers made me change the story in the report so it was more tasteful to read for the family. They also changed story: officially he died in ambulance so they could still transport ‘living’ body in ambulance…
What struck me most was that the rest of the world goes on like nothing happened. People still go after trivial things. Shop discounts. Children play. Birds sing. And: There is now music or switching camera angles in reality. It was so different than in Hollywood. Dead people are not scary. It’s the living people that you can love but can also be a threat.